NEW-BOLD Creations

I sent these to CarbonKnight already but if you have some crits for these it'd help




I know the 3rd pg is the weakest and there's already a few things that I'm going to fix.
Help me add to my list!
thanks

I like page one.

Panel one - I think you could get away with spotting more blacks in the foreground, and in the grave as a way of highlighing the key area (framing it, I guess), and guiding the eye where you want it. In general, I really like this panel.

Panel two - Good use of the cross in the background to keep the camera movement grounded. I also like the way you've established depth between the two figures as well as in the background. I'd almost want to see you bring one figure (probably the guy in the background) more into the panel. They're both similarly posed and cropped by the panel border. This would just be a way to break up any unwanted symmetry.

Panel three - I REALLY like this panel. I think you've done everything nicely with this (though again, the characters are very similarly cropped on either side of the panel). Probably the only problem I'd have with this panel would be the similarity of Batman's shaded form to that of the angel statue in the first panel. When I first glanced at the page, those two images drew my eye, and I kept associating them.

This is probably just a bunch of nitpicking, but those are a few suggestions that came to me immediately. I've got to get back to work on these pages, but I'll post more soon.

-B

Nice layouts, Dave. Good points, Brett. I'm way to busy to even be posting this, so back to work for me.

I am confused by what the bearded guy is doing in panel 2, 2nd page.

is he adjusting his bluetooth set? other than the rather thorough tweaks that Brett mentioned I gots nothing

Brett- Great suggestions man. I'm not too far along that I can't incorporate some of these ideas. cool. Fire away at the other two pgs too if you got time. I've got a differnt panel for 3.2 I'll post later. If you want, post your pgs man, I'd love to see to see them.

5mpig- bearded guy is pulling out a gun and talking on a cell phone in pg2.2. i'm gonna fix this so it reads a little better.

josh- you homo, get back to work, your mom needs money to pay me for my services